Nov 21, 2007

Marky's Mark

Marky Mark and Kate Moss - beauty and the beastess.

Back in the day, Mark Wahlberg was Marky Mark, the sexy, shirtless, and white rapper. After that, he became a Calvin Klein icon, and after that, an actor. This week, I caught Mark in Tim Burton's 2001 "vision" of Planet of the Apes, and though his physique is better than ever, as an actor, he's no Charlton Heston. Which leads me to a rant, because Heston (who I suppose was fine beefcake for his day), rode around practically naked in the original Planet of the Apes, while Wahlberg, who's only ace is his studboy body, never, ever, EVER even takes his shirt off. Was Burton afraid that the sight of all that hunky muscle might distract from his performance? Christ, if only.

Planet of the Apes is best understood if we see the "apes" as the humans, and the humans as the "angels". Thus we have Wahlberg playing Leo Davidson (sun god, son of David) and his angelic host (all dressed in space-aged white) circling Saturn in the Oberon (Merovingian King of the Elves), with bio-engineered proto-humans/servants aboard. Something goes terribly awry, and the space station crashes down on a planet with twin moons (like Tatooin), where the proto-humans revolt against their masters, and eventually evolve into... us. A heartwarming tale of Illuminati inspired Panspermia.

On Tim's planet, the gorillas are big, black and brutish, and they sound black. While the "enlightened" chimps (Ari and family) are light skinned, and somehow speak with an English public school accent, and since Helena Bonham Carter plays the Princess Chimp, that would make sense. The humans playing humans are blond and beautiful (though in dire need of a bath). The apes follow a superstitious religion based on Semos - the first ape - a sort of Adam/Jesus hybrid.

The apes make the human slaves take a brand - a "mark" - which happens to be the symbol of the trident - Poseidon/Prince Namor/Dagon. See The Trident Strikes Again at Through the Looking Glass, and Adam Star at Inside the Cosmic Cube has more (much more) on the comic book incarnation of Poseidon - The Submariner.

When Leo departs the planet, he kisses Ari goodbye, which I take as symbolic of the angel/human genome project.

At the climax of the final battle between men and apes on the plains of Calima (Armageddon)... "a familiar vehicle descends from the sky and is identified immediately by Leo. It is the pod piloted by Pericles, the chimp astronaut. Apparently, Pericles got pushed forward in time just like Leo and has just now found his way to the planet. When Pericles lands, the apes interpret his landing as the arrival of Semos, the first ape, who is their god. They bow, and hostilities between humans and apes immediately cease." --wikipedia

I swear, if "aliens" pretending to be Jesus don't land on earth in 2012, I will be so fucking disappointed.

Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch - Good Vibrations

14 comments:

JB said...

With all the suddenly dead serious UFO talk on CNN these days, and with Saturn supposedly becoming a second sun (thanks to the Jesuit Cassini space penis/probe) only 10 MONTHS from now, I'm willing to bet that "First Contact" will occur at some point in 2008.

Remember, in the Star Trek Universe, "First Contact" happened only AFTER WWIII, and it involved a giant black beehive/cube from the future, full of drones and their queen wanting to turn us into even more mindless, robotic drones.

P.S. Don't forget to check out my latest article, based once again on your fantastic "The Quest" series.

Unknown said...

Wow, I never realized the Merovingian connection to the character of Oberon before. That is truly something significant. I've never seen a single Planet of the Apes movie in my life. I think it's the only Burton movie I haven't seen. But I am slowly learning my own lesson and I will check it out, tonight maybe.

Cheers

Michael said...

JB - That Star Trek movie is never far from my musings. And thanks for the heads up about your article - it's nice to be linked.

AS - The original is far better than Burton's attempt, though they each have their synchs.

Atlantean Times said...

"I swear, if "aliens" pretending to be Jesus don't land on earth in 2012, I will be so fucking disappointed."

me too.....lolololol

Michael said...

I was thinking about Adam's comment about Oberon being the Elf King.

Peter Jackson's elves look like Vulcans, who look like Prince Namor - an Atlantean. So it's a nice connection to have a "Vulcan" space station named after an elf, who's "mark" is a trident.

JB said...

Don't forget that J. R. R. Tolkien's Elves originally came from Numenor (also called Andor), a rather large island in the middle of the Western Sea, shaped like a five-pointed star, obviously Atlantis.

JB said...

^Just wrote an article about it on my sight. :p

Unknown said...

I'm so in love with the Namor/Tolkien/Vulcans/Atlanteans circle, totally amazing. Especially if you add the oddball fact of Namor's creator Bill Everett's true name being William Blake, of whom he's a direct descendant. The original Blake's concept of Albion attaches the origins of Britain to Lost Atlantis. The origins of Britain is much what Tolkien was all about as well. Also, anyone who's ever seen a photo of Lovecraft knows H.P. was a Vulcan.

Burton's Planet of the Apes, I liked it much more then I thought I would. Such a goofy concept. I'll have to keep my eye out for the real deal on TCM or somewhere. Pseudo-science and reverse time holes aside, the whole thing can only be a dream or the afterlife of Marky Mark. How long do you think he's meant to be on the Planet? He's clean shaven throughout. Marky Mark is fairly wooden as actors go, but you got to hand it to the Ape performers, the makeup artists, costumers, set designers, etc. That Paul Giamatti was so obviously himself and also a sleazy orangutan at the same time. He's really gifted. An orangutan named Limbo no less.

JB said...

About Burton's PotA, I think Mark might have fallen into a sort of "Nexus", like in Star Trek: Generations, a super-dense time string that makes whatever you imagine come true, which would explain the weird-ass ending. He's still inside the Nexus, imagining that his own world is now populated with talking apes! Meanwhile, the Oberon is still in orbit around Saturn, the crew is fine, and they're wondering: "What ever happened to Mark?"

Michael said...

JB - awesome! Great post at meta-logic cafe.

AS -The Everett/Blake synch is amazing. The esoteric idea that Britain (Albion) is the remnant of Lost Atlantis seems to have major pull in the underground stream.

Burton's Planet of the Apes - what do you make of the design of the Oberon? My symbol detectors pegged when I saw it, but I can't place it. I loved Tim Roth as Thade - very convincing.

The original movie has Charlton Heston in the "ancient astronaut" role, which is great, considering he was Moses.

Wahlberg's beardlessness is an Apollo resonator.

Unknown said...

Well, I totally think you pegged it when you talked about Pan-Spermia. The little space crafts were so sperm shaped and the Oberon was a big phallus, slightly obscured by pointing down instead of up or out. I suppose the Sword of Damacles too, but same thing really. The Merovingeaness of Thade's family was great to watch after learning the Oberon connection. That Burton, very clever. "Sweeny Todd" comes out soon with Johnny Depp cutting hair (and more) again. Looks like Edward Scissorhands divided by From Hell, carry the Sleepy Hollow.

Michael said...

Oh yea. Pan's Sperm. :-) The sword of Damacles - I see the hilt now. Very perceptive.

The whole Merovingian/noble chimp thing. Very clever, as you say. One other small mythic point, is that Leo departs the Oberon as a rebel (angel) disobeying protocol. So he also resonates Prometheus, stealing fire from the Gods.

Anonymous said...

This whole UFO thing is going faster every year. It seems almost unreal how several years ago I first heard of satan's contingency plan for the rapture would be "Aliens" comming back to help us from the other bad guy(s) who would be Jesus himself at the Second Comming. Satan doesn't know when, but he does know it's very soon. You have been blessed with a great mind to think of things as you have.

Michael said...

Thanks Anon, much appreciated.

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