Feb 21, 2011

The Superman App


I’m reading The Superman App by JP71 at Evolution Archives this week, which is about a sentient mobile phone (probably from the future) that has only 3 apps (apples) but they are the only three that really matter: “genital enhancement”, “lottery picker” and “superman”. The phone is essentially a Genie, a near omnipotent servant. The Djinn makes frequent appearances in homoerotic fiction and I had a facepalm moment when I realized that Aladdin had to RUB the lamp in order to summon the Genie:
Phenomenal Cosmic Powers - in an itty-bitty living space.
You get apps from the Apple Store. The genie of the lamp is blue, just like the Smerfs, who are “3 apples high”. The gay blue elves live in amanita mushrooms. The entheogen theory of the human evolution of consciousness states that the “apple” from the Tree of Knowledge was in fact, a magic mushroom. Cocks have “mushroom heads”. Smerfs wear white Stygian caps, which makes them resemble... sperm. God, I’ve been around this sync loop so many times I’m dizzy!

Avalon is the 'Isle of Apples', the medieval app store. The Holy Grail (according to One King, One Soldier):
It is what will complete the Ark of the Covenant, and restore its Old Testament power. It may be a part of the Table of Moses; it may be a fragment of the Emerald Tablet of Thoth; it may be what the Egyptians revered as the head of Osiris; it is possible that those three things are one and the same. The Grail is that which restores power.
The “head” of Osiris does not sit on his shoulders, it rides just below his hips. It is the “missing phallus” that restores the Kingdom of Egypt. Horus is born from the "golden phallus", who is "superman". In One King, One Soldier, the character named “George” is a “Grail Bearer”, who carries the Grail in a leather pouch attached to his hip...

Back to the Superman App:
Before we establish a connection, Derek, it might be prudent to tell you of the third and final app available for your enjoyment. This, however, due to a software glitch, I am sorry to inform you, can only work in scry mode. In other words, you, as my owner, cannot be directly affected by the effects of the upgrade. However, the subject of my scrying can. Unlike the enhancement of your genitalia, there are TEN upgrade levels to this app.
Hmmm. In other words, the Djinn only grants the wishes of others:
Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. --Matthew 7:12
I imagine that the Golden Rule is sort of a “fail safe” in the Cosmic OS. It’s designed to prevent ego from running amok in the Genie 7-11, stealing the till and all the Doritos and beer. It’s a great idea, but somehow, I think we’ve been hacked.

4 comments:

Eleleth ר ק D said...

As Crowley states, the whole Aladdin thing conceals "technical tales of magic." And quite rightly so, as Djinn are created from the semen of the magician.

In The Smurfs, Gargamel is an alchemist who need the Smurfs to create the Philosopher's Stone.

When Gargamel first appeared in Le Voleur de schtroumpf ("The Smurfnapper"), published in 1959, he captured a smurf which he needed as an ingredient for a potion to make gold in accordance with the famed alchemic legend of the Philosopher's Stone.

Dürer's Melancholia shows a very suggestive leather pouch...with a key.

The Treasury Seal on the dollar bill also clearly states that the scales (test-icles) are the "key".

Alan Abbadessa-Green said...

Horus and Matthew 7:12
Really?
Jesus, I just put this up last night:
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150192595864741&set=a.214814419740.172774.156810264740&theater

See also "Ten Apples Up On Top" which seems to be telling the story of the Tree of Life and/or Kundalini rising, leading to revolution and order out of chaos.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Ten-Apples-Up-On-Top/Dr-Seuss/e/9780679892472/

Michael said...

Eleleth: Gargamel sounds like Jafar, the (queer) wizard of Disney's Aladdin. He eventually gains his heart's desire, which is to become as powerful as a Genie, only to find he is then "bound within the lamp" and can only express his power while serving his "master". It amuses me to think I have a "Jafar" living inside my "lamp".

Alan: That's crazy. The Power of 10 keeps resonating for me. From B&N:

"When Theodore Suess Geisel wrote books that others illustrated, he use the pen name LeSieg, which is his own name spelled backwards."

I noted that this post happened to be no. 441 in my Journal, the reverse of my totem number.

Devin said...

Really enjoyed this very fascinating post Michael!!
can't add anything to it --but will think --sometimes if i put stuff on 'simmer' mode a thought will occur to me out of the blue as they say!!
very much enjoyed Eleleth and Alans' comments too in these posts!!
all the best to you and Var --hope you both are doing great!!
wv-bacin

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