The Golden Retriever

As many gay men do, I sublimate (admittedly feeble) child rearing urges onto my dog Oliver, a spunky terrier who stands about three apples tall. His coat is even a little blue if you catch him in the right light, but whether it’s blue or really grey, I can’t tell.

Oliver and I have recurring themes in our lives, which happen to be played by golden retrievers:

• Oliver was attacked and mauled by a golden retriever when he was just a puppy.
• Maya was the name of our (then) land lord’s golden retriever.
• Oliver and Maya grew up together, they were great friends.
• In 2003, our Russian friends got a golden retriever puppy, who they named Paris.
• On the day after the 2004 presidential election, Oliver was attacked by yet another golden.

In Hinduism, Samsara is seen as ignorance of the True Self, Brahman, and thus the soul is led to believe in the reality of the temporal, phenomenal world. The state of illusion is known as Maya. Maya is probably another word for Satan - the deceiver.

I think of the Maya (illusions) I grew up with, and how warm and fuzzy they appeared - God and country, family and property, and Santa. Santa (anagram of Satan, BTW) is perhaps the cruelest trick ever pulled on a child, growing cynicism in one so young. When you find out that it’s all a sham, and that your most trusted guardians are all IN on it, it’s like... Monarch programming isn’t just for the elite anymore. No, Virgin(ia), there really isn’t a Santa Claus, and let me totally fuck you up with that.

Elections and the sham of democracy are another grand American dream/illusion, which that golden retriever eloquently underlined. Even Paris, the 'Grail thief', is a golden. Which makes me wonder what this drama is really all about:

Is Maya (Santa/Satan/Paris) retrieving something golden for God?