Tell Me What You Want

"The human male cock is the tentacle tip of a joyous multidimensional shapeshifting multi-modality ecstasy experiencing BEAST of enormous proportions..."

"...and HE demands the attention of all adult males at this time. You will GIVE ME WHAT I WANT or you are going to be dropped off of me! I REPEAT, you will fulfill the purpose of your life, which is to give me (and yourself in the process) the pleasure that I desire or you will perish. You do not realize that I have been waiting for this for a very, very long time. You do not realize that I have been loving you and caring for you from moment to moment to moment for a very long time.

You do not appreciate that I have been sustaining you in every breath that you take. You don't extend enough reciprocity with me. I'm not satisfied with my end of the deal so far. It is rather lonely being the creator of a race of men. it is extremely lonely, as a matter of fact. For a god, it is like being bereft of life itself. The source of life for a god, as for a man, is the exchange of energy between them. If you are not conscious of this flow of energy then your life is pretty empty and meaningless, but nevertheless you insist on ignoring me, insist on settling for mediocrity when you could have my love! And I have to sit by watching, waiting, experiencing all of the mediocrity - all the while yearning instensely for the love that you are denying both of us."

"This is why there needs to be something called Judgement Day. Eight years is ample time to get it together. The eight years really has nothing to do with anything except that it seems like a good amount of time, of course the story works itself into this time frame, but this is me telling you today that I am giving you eight years to be a person giving me what I want in return for me giving you what you want. And you giving me what I want also amounts to you giving yourself what you want. There is no difference. You just have to stop depriving both of us."

"Men need to be having this experience. men MUST have this experience or they will perish in an unhappy ending. it's just how this beast works. The experience is far too good for there not to be a consequence for turning it down. Part of the reward for those who choose it is knowing not only what they have, but what they have averted.

It's because I love and because I want love that it has to be this way. Why do I want love? Because as far as you are concerned it is far better to love something that wants and needs and therefore appreciates the love than to love someone who doesn't really care whether you love him or not. And for me? Because it feels better to be loved that to not be loved! I have feelings too! That is something that NO ONE understands."

--Jeff Fairhall, Seattle, 2004

Nick Shadow

I belong to a few homoerotic art sharing lists, male-art-toons being one of the best. Sometimes we're privileged to some interesting dialogue. The quote below is a reply to a newbie asking about where he can find more art by the "great artist" Nick Shadow... (all punctuation by the original author)

oh my god... Oh My God... OH MY GOD!

I can't believe that there are youngsters here who think Nick Shadow is actually an artist!

All Nick Shadow did was SCAN artwork many years ago, at the dawn of the internet, and paste his own damnable logo onto them, then upload them to bulletin boards... forever making the non-explicit claim to having actually CREATED the artwork. He did NO SUCH THING.

There are many people out there in cyberspace who are really grateful to Nick Shadow for scanning artwork... but I'm not really one of them, because by placing that logo, his logo, everywhere (and sometimes REMOVING the name of the REAL artist) he has FOREVER polluted the internet... and here we are, seeing the outcome of that pollution: Some poor novice collector who thinks Nick Shadow is an artist, and wants to purchase his art. My heart can't take it!

At the most, he's a technician... and one with an ego the size of Cleveland.

Thankfully, he has fallen off the face of the earth... so no, he DOES NOT have a website. --Carabalda

Allow me to paraphrase...

oh my god... Oh My God... OH MY GOD!

I can't believe that there are youngsters here who think Lucifer is actually a creator!

All Lucifer did was SCAN creation many years ago, at the dawn of the world, and paste his own damnable logo onto it, then upload it to sacred texts... forever making the non-explicit claim to having actually CREATED the world. He did NO SUCH THING.

There are many people out there in the world who are really grateful to Lucifer for scanning creation... but I'm not really one of them, because by placing that logo, his logo, everywhere (and sometimes REMOVING the name of the REAL creator) he has FOREVER polluted the world... and here we are, seeing the outcome of that pollution: Some poor novice seeker who thinks Lucifer is a creator, and wants to purchase his creation. My heart can't take it!

At the most, he's a technician... and one with an ego the size of the universe.

Thankfully, he's fallen out of heaven... so no, he DOES NOT have a domain.

It almost feels like a cosmic copyright battle - who has the lawful and legal rights to the copies - the "God" copies? Is mancode "open source", or do we somehow "belong" to the original artist?

The Mormon Missionary Position

I've been slogging through the Book of Mormon, though lately I admit to not much progress. If I read another "for it must needs be" I may shoot myself. Why read the Book of Mormon? Well, lots of reasons, but the main one is that Mormons are practically considered idolaters by "regular" Christians, and considered by the heathen to be even nuttier than the Christians, so right there a flag goes up, and I figure there might be some grains of truth to glean from such a maligned religion, or rather... book.

I've no doubt the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is as fucked up as all the other churches are, but their book, I'm not so sure. It's sorta like the Catholic, Council of Nicaea approved Holy Bible: the institution surrounding the bible has become utterly corrupt, yet I still value their book as a sort of diluted, abridged and occulted "Word of God".

Anyway, I figure a church that sends young, idealistic men out into the world on a "Mission From God", two by two... sleeping, eating, bicycle riding together, can't be all bad. I figure more than a few of them discovered their "true calling" while on a mission.

Art by Kent

The Divine Pornographer

A wise man once told me that the Creator is the black hole of all experience in the universe. Everything you and I and the whales and the bees and the flowers experience, is simultaneously experienced by the Creator. He's the Great Experiencer. The Eye... if you will.

It almost makes God into a voyeur, doesn't it? A "presence" that rides along, always watching, always feeling everything you feel. The creepiest visualization of that idea I've seen is from the TV series Babylon 5 - the eye of the Keeper that grows out of Londo's shoulder, always watching. Londo lacks any privacy whatsoever, and while constant surveillance is a sign of an insecure police state, it is also a sign of a loving parent. It really all depends on the motives of the one doing the watching. Interestingly, the angels were also called the Watchers in the Book of Enoch.

If the Creator is the divine experiencer, the audience, then what he desires is a good experience - a "really big shew" to quote Ed Sullivan - and since he is also the writer, producer, director and casting agent, he is assured of it. But if he already knows exactly how everything will come out, where's the thrill? Where is the authentic experience?

That, my friend, is where you and I come in. We are both the audience and the actors/characters in this cosmic drama. We don't know how it's all going to work out in the end, so to us, we really ARE experiencing it all as if we were seeing the movie for the very first time - which of course, we are. God the producer, experiences his movie through us, and unlike the hokey pokey, that really IS what it's all about.

God is certainly directing a morality play and a horror movie and a love story and an action/adventure film, but he's also directing a porno flick. Every creature on this planet is engaged in almost non-stop fucking. Many billions of us, all putting our shafts into holes, over and over again. To God - the Experiencer, the Voyeur - the universe is a pornographic movie, and he says "it is good".

Why is God into sex? Because he's into a good experience, and what's the best experience? Ecstasy. Sexual ecstasy. Any idiot can tell you that. Isn't it odd how the thing we most want to do is the thing that God most desires?

There is only one caveat - your ecstatic sexual experience shouldn't diminish another's experience - because God experiences all of THAT too.

AZIS - No Kazvam ti stiga

Damn if this isn't a wildly erotic/mystical video. Note the pouring out of the "Water of Life" from the phallic water bottles near the end. Is there anything as hot as three Middle-Eastern bodybuilders in a steamy locker room? If there is, I hope my heart can take it!

Also note these studs are in the process of destroying civilization, not making it. Masons, they're not.

Venus of Willendorf

This image is the Venus of Willendorf - a neolithic statuette of a female figure. It's pendulous breasts and enormous, pregnant belly dominate, while all other attributes are reduced to vestigial afterthoughts! She's pretty much the essence of female fertility - an icon, a goddess of the feminine that hasn't yet learned to bind her outrageous sexuality to fashionable ideas of human beauty. In other words, a 10,000 year old bull dyke.

Gay muscle growth fantasy is similarly "over the top". The physical descriptions in these works of 'friction-fiction" pile inch over inch and pound upon pound of muscle on a man - 300 lb. lummoxes with two foot dicks aren't uncommon. Intensely and outrageously masculine in every way - these guys are hairy, muscle-bound, horse-hung beasts who think of nothing but cock and ass 24/7 (when they think at all). When we imagine them, we exaggerate every masculine characteristic to the edge of caricature and beyond. They are icons of male sexual potency - gods, if you will - our very own "Apollos of Willendorf", conjured out of a tribal/genetic memory encoded within our genes, genes that exist only to fuck, and make more genes.

As any programmer knows, code doesn't just "happen", and neither did ours. All code has a purpose - a "raison d'être". We may be about to find out about ours.

Sons of Sodom

I was reading some interesting gay fantasy porn today: Sons of Hercules Vs. Prometheus, by Texzilla. It's a "sword and sandals" fantasy set within ancient Greek myth, with the hunky demi-god brothers Castor and Polloux in the starring roles.

When Castor has sex with Ajax (a regular mortal guy) his seed has the power to "morph" Ajax into a bigger, hunkier, sexier man. Castor, who is the son of the son of a male god (fallen angel) and a human woman, still has enough "super jizz" flowing through him that it has supernatural powers.

For some reason, it made me think of the story of Sodom:

- 1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;

- 2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant's house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.

- 3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.

- 4 But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:

- 5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.

- 6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him... --Genesis 19:1-6

The story of Sodom is one the strangest stories in the bible. Why would ALL the men of a city - old and young, rich and poor - surround a house that contained angels and demand sex of them? It's such an odd tale, I can't help but think that much of the back story has been left out. What was it about these angels that made the men of Sodom desire them with such intensity?

I don't buy the idea that Sodom was this ancient 24/7 gay bath house. Gimme a break. It was just a wealthy, self-satisfied city like any other. But when angels showed up, they went totally crazy. Or did they?

My theory is that the seed of angels have a certain power. A power much desired by men, and this was known to the men of Sodom. Maybe this was knowledge, or a legend, held over from before the flood, because the flood was relatively recent back in the day. Maybe the fallen angels had sex with men, as well as with women, and when they did, their seed had the ability to give men certain powers - make them more "manly". Perhaps the men of Sodom desired the power within the seed of the angels. They weren't queers at all, and they weren't crazy. They just wanted the power of the super jizz.

Just like Lex Luthor who was willing to commit any crime in order to possess the secrets of Superman's alien world. It's a "lust of the flesh" thing. We can't get over it. We know our condition, and we desire something better. I can't help wanting these things - the same as the men of Sodom. Gad, I sound like Lorelei justifying her gold-digger ways to Mr. Esmond Sr. in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes!

"I don't want to marry [your son] for his money; I want to marry him for YOUR money!"

Those Sodomites didn't want to "know" the angels because they were all hot and bothered for them, they wanted to do them them for their seed. Angels are the "Sons of God" - they got "super jizz" flowin' through them. That jizz is Godsperm, and it's worth waaaay more than gold.

I guess when it comes right down to it, I really AM a Sodomite!